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Continued from previous page…
“I don’t think she watches that many soap-operas,” said Gina.
“Hell, yeah, she does,” rebuked Jane. “She watches As The World Turns, she watches General Hospital.”
“Everyone watches General Hospital,” informed Belinda.
“Remember how bad she wanted to be on Dallas?” asked Gina.
“Omigod, I know… When she didn’t get the part, she was so bummed-out, I could tell… I told her she wouldn’t get it,” said Jane.
“You told her she wouldn’t get the part?” repeated Belinda with a surprised tone.
“Well, not in a mean-spirited kind of way,” defended Jane.
“What other way is there, Jane?” asked Gina.
“Well, she was drivin’ me nuts with all that talk about it… I just told her that I didn’t think that CBS would give her two shows at the same time, that’s all,” said Jane.
Gina and Belinda seemed relatively satisfied with Jane’s explanation, despite the dubious glances they passed on to each other.
Another rumble of thunder penetrated through the walls of Belinda’s home. Even though the volume from the television set was slightly higher than mid-level, the sudden gusts of wind-swept rain could easily be heard as the drops pounded against the front window. Despite the commotion, it was a welcome dousing for southern California, guided by a jet-stream from the north, and fueled by the heavy, July humidity. Still, Belinda’s pet rabbit, Enrico, didn’t like all the disturbance. Lorna wasn’t too sure about it either.
“How’s that thing on your ear?” Belinda asked Jane.
“Oh, that’s long gone,” explained Jane. “That was over a year ago. They just sliced it open and drained it.. There’s not even any scar.”
“I can’t believe you said Terry was afraid to touch it because he thought it might be infectious,” laughed Gina.
“Oh, gawd.. He is such a goof,” remarked Jane, referring to her old boyfriend. “I love him to death, but he is such a moron sometimes. He didn’t even wanna have sex with me half the time we were in Hawaii because he was afraid of it.”
As Belinda and Gina laughed at Jane’s amusing tale, Jane summed things up by revealing…
“Luckily, he was such a horny fucker, I never had to worry about it after a few drinks.”
Suddenly, an alarming aroma filled the air.
“Oh, shit, the cookies are burning,” exclaimed Belinda.
Belinda got up from the couch, placed Lorna in her crib, then hustled into the kitchen. She opened up the door to the oven and waved some of the smoke out of the way. Much to her relief, her examination of the cookies revealed little damage to the precious cargo.
“Are they burnt?” yelled Gina from the other room.
“No.. they’re okay,” Belinda yelled back. “Just a little bit on the bottom.”
Belinda put on her oven-mitts, pulled the trays out of the oven and placed them on top of the stove. After scooping up a bunch of them and placing them on a plate, she paraded back into the living room like the dutiful party hostess of the twentieth-century.
The three of them wasted no time in attacking the delicious morsels.
“Speaking of a year ago,” said Jane in between chewing. “I’m still not giving up on finding out what happened to our private detective.”
Belinda and Gina both let out a collective groan. Neither one of them wanted to hear any more about the deceased P.I. that inhabited the eternal underground of their heralded estate in North Palm Springs.
“Jane, what are you planning?” asked Gina.
“Nothing,” Jane posed, obviously lying. “I just have an appointment with someone this Saturday, that’s all.”
Jane was referring to her upcoming meeting with Jonas Sieganthaler down at the docks. Also, she was teasing Belinda and Gina with her tidbit of information.
“Jane, don’t go doing anything stupid,” warned Belinda. “We’ve talked about this a million times.”
“Who do you have an appointment with?” demanded Gina.
“I’m not telling,” Jane teased. “If Kathy won’t say anything, then neither will I.”
Gina and Belinda looked across at each other. Neither one of them had any idea what Jane was talking about.
“What does Kathy know?” asked Belinda.
“Forget it.. I’m not saying anything,” said Jane. “She was supposed to tell me something a long time ago and she never did.. so, forget it.. if she’s not gonna say anything, then I’m not gonna say anything.”
Belinda and Gina both rolled their eyes. They knew that Jane was just playing games like she loved to do.
“If she likes being such a smarty-pants…”
Jane’s sentence was interrupted by the telephone ringing. Belinda got up to answer it in the kitchen.
BELINDA
Hello?
VOICE
Hey, man,
what’s goin’ on?
BELINDA
Kathy?
KATHY
Yeah, what’s up?
Belinda is
surprised
by the timing.
BELINDA
Wow, did your ears
just start ringing?
KATHY
No, but I assume your
phone just did.
BELINDA
How bout’ that. I
can’t believe it’s you.
How spooky.
KATHY
Oh…
Were you expecting
an Exorcist or something?
BELINDA
Jane and Gina are here.
KATHY
That’s what I meant—
Were you expecting an
Exorcist?
BELINDA
(amused)
No, they just stopped by
to play with Lorna.
KATHY
So.. why would my ears be
ringing? Were you guys
talkin’ about me behind
my back?
BELINDA
Absolutely…
Some pretty bad
stuff, too… We trashin’ you
good, girlfriend.
KATHY
(joking, we hope)
I’ll bet…
Did Jane bring over
that double-headed dildo I
bought her… for you guys to
use on each other?
BELINDA
No, but we just
got done talkin’
about that dream you
had about Charlotte.
KATHY
You mean—
the one where she
was drivin’ a diaper truck?
BELINDA
No, the one where she was
kidnapped by the General
Hospital guy.
KATHY
Ohh, I love that one !
That one’s my favorite. That’s
by far the most vivid dream I’ve
ever had… Did I ever tell you how
we got off the island?
BELINDA
I can’t remember.
KATHY
We flew away together
like birds.
BELINDA
(laughs)
Now, that sounds
like a dream.
KATHY
Yup.
No plane, no nothin.’
We just spread open our arms
and— whoosh! Off we went.
BELINDA
That is so hilarious…
So, what’s
up with you?!
KATHY
Nothing!
I called to see if you
wanted to get fucked up
this weekend?
BELINDA
Oh, man, I don’t
think I can.
KATHY
Oh, come on!
It’s been two
months already!
BELINDA
I know, I know…
I just don’t think it’s
good timing right now.
KATHY
(bummed)
Why not?
BELINDA
Uh.. DUH..
I have a five-month-old
daughter.
KATHY
So get a babysitter.
BELINDA
What about the next day?
When I need some sleep?
KATHY
So hire one
for two days.
BELINDA
Kathy, come on…
KATHY
Well, what am I
supposed to do?!
BELINDA
Party with Gina.
KATHY
Ahh, she can’t go all night
like you can.. You’re the only
one who can do it.
BELINDA
What do you mean,
I’m the only one who can do it?
You know every guitarist
in Los Angeles.
KATHY
Yeah, I know, but it’s
not the same…
It’s no fun without you.
BELINDA
(flattered)
Well.. hey.. I appreciate the
compliment there.. ol’ buddy
ol’ pal… but I’m really hoping
that Myles will stop by.
KATHY
Have you heard
from him?
BELINDA
Yes!
As a matter of fact,
he stopped by here
this afternoon.
KATHY
Oh, really?!
BELINDA
Yup.. He came by here
to see Lorna…
And we talked.. and..
we had a nice
time… It was nice.
KATHY
He’s gonna come back
to you, Belinda.
BELINDA
I hope so…
That’s what everyone
keeps telling me.
KATHY
(surrenders)
Alright…
I guess love triumphs
over everything.
BELINDA
Thanks, Kath.
KATHY
But..
I want you to know..
You’re crampin’ my style, honey.
I want you to know that.
BELINDA
I know, I’m sorry.
I’ll make it up to you..
We’ll go out soon.
I promise.
KATHY
We better.
BELINDA
We will.
KATHY
How’s Lorna?
BELINDA
She’s a dream…
I just wanna
gobble her up.
KATHY
You’re so lucky.
BELINDA
I know, I can’t believe it…
Ya’ know, speaking of dreams
again, Jane said something
strange a few minutes ago.
KATHY
Uh..
you’re gonna need to
be more specific than that—
When does Jane not
say something strange?
BELINDA
She said she had an
appointment to see somebody
about our dear friend
buried in the back yard.
KATHY
What?!!
BELINDA
Yup…
She said she was seeing
somebody this Saturday.. and that
she wasn’t gonna tell us about it.
It was a secret.
KATHY
Oh, goddammit, Jane !!
What the fuck is wrong
with her?!!
BELINDA
You askin’ me?
KATHY
She’s gonna fuck
this up, ya’ know!
You know that, don’t you?
BELINDA
I know.
KATHY
She’s gonna end up
tellin’ somebody the
wrong thing… and then the
cops are gonna come
around askin’ questions!
BELINDA
I know…
I told her not to do
anything stupid…
I warned her.
KATHY
Jeezus, Jane!
Why can’t she let this go?
BELINDA
I don’t know…
She said you were supposed
to tell her something a long
time ago and you never did…
And now she’s all mad about it…
That’s why she’s doing this.
KATHY
Oh, God, what is
she talkin’ about?
BELINDA
I don’t know, you tell me…
What were you supposed
to tell her?
KATHY
The fuck if I know…
How is anyone supposed
to know what goes on
inside of her head?
BELINDA
Well, ya’ better
do something!
Maybe you should talk to her.
KATHY
Oh, I wouldn’t know
what to say…
It’s just the same
old shit over and over.
BELINDA
Maybe you should
follow her and
cut her off at the path.
KATHY
Fuck that,
I’m not wastin’ my time…
Maybe I’ll get one of those
Uterus dorks to follow
her and report back to me.
BELINDA
Whatever.
Kathy takes an
extended pause
to soak all this in.
Then she sighs
heavily from
exhaustion and
finishes her
conversation.
KATHY
Alright… well…
if you change your
mind about this weekend,
just gimme a call.
BELINDA
Alright, I will.
KATHY
Alright…
See ya.’
BELINDA
Later, Nader.
KATHY
Later, Ralph.
AUTHOR’S NOTE:
I know it’s not much,
but it’s the best I can do
My gift is my entry
and this one’s for you…
Happy Birthday, Belinda !!