36
Friday, June 17th, 1983, 3:07 P.M.
“Okay, my turn!!” exclaimed Belinda, excitedly, as she picked up the instrument of brain cell destruction and prepared to get situated.
“Alright, let’s do this,” agreed Kathy. “Assume the position, my sacrificial lamb.”
Belinda got down on her knees, which proceeded to trigger the first wave of lewd comments from the two members of the Peanut Gallery. But now, she had just stuck a round, plastic tube in her mouth— which triggered the second wave.
Kathy grabbed a frosty out of the cooler and cracked it open while Gina steadied the funnel.
“No spewing this time, you got that?” instructed Kathy.
“Yeah, try and keep your lips sealed,” referenced Gina.
Belinda removed the plastic tube from her mouth, and with perfect, comic technique, impersonated a mentally-handicapped person:
“I don’t get it!” she mocked in Gina’s direction, complete with the facial gestures. Apparently, Belinda’s time spent working on a sitcom was paying off.
Belinda put the tube back in her mouth and wiggled her butt to get prepared. Kathy filled up the funnel with beer and handed out the instructions—
“You ready?” she asked Belinda.
Belinda nodded her head.
“Okay, Gino, hit it!” said Kathy, throwing down her hand as if she had thrown down the starting flag at the Daytona 500.
Gina lifted up the funnel above Belinda’s head, just far enough to let gravity do it’s thing, while Belinda started downing the carbonated wonderment.
“Go, go, go!!” the two of them chanted, egging on Belinda.
“Go, go, you fuckin’ Go-Go!!” shouted Gina.
“Suck it, bitch!!” yelled Kathy. “Take it all in… Swallow!!!”
Belinda could not hold out any longer. The comments by Kathy and Gina were designed to make her spill and they were starting to work. She burst into laughter, which caused the beer to spew out all over her. She made a meek attempt at trying to put her thumb over the hole, but wasn’t having much success. The beer continued to flow out unimpeded.
Gina bailed her out by gaining control of the tube, then stuck it in her own mouth. She sucked down the remaining remnants of the bong like a pro, then let out a magnificent belch.
“See, that’s how you get it done, Babe!” proclaimed Gina, handing the bong back to Kathy.
“No fair, you guys made me laugh!” defended Belinda. “If you hadn’t done that, I would’ve finished it, easily.”
“Ohh, poor baby,” said Gina, making a pouty face. “I feel so sorry for you.” Gina put up her hands and made a move towards Belinda, making Belinda put up her own hands to fend her off. They hand wrestled like that for a few seconds until Gina lost her balance and fell right on top of her.
“Dog pile!” yelled out Kathy, as she flopped down on top of the both of them. Unfortunately, as quickly as she landed on top of them, she just as quickly slid right off the back of Gina. Belinda reached up and pushed Gina off to the side of her as the three of them stood up on their feet. The effects of chugging beer had made their buzzes a bit more effervescent than usual, causing a certain two of them to start feeling a little bit rambunctious. Having just done something physical with each other, Kathy and Gina started looking at each other with devilish faces.
“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” asked Kathy.
“Oh, yeah, definitely,” returned Gina.
Belinda, already breathing heavily, put up her hands to provide a shield.
“Oh, no, no, no, get the fuck away from me,” she warned.
But, it was too late. Kathy and Gina started circling around Belinda like a couple of hyenas closing in on a helpless, baby zebra. Tormenting Belinda was especially fun since she was the designated Princess of the group and got all the attention from the media. Belinda, on the other hand, didn’t see it as being picked-on. She knew how the band felt about her status and why these two were now ready to jump on her. It was a sign of respect— and love— and Belinda couldn’t be more right.
Gina shouted, “Get her!” as she and Kathy swarmed in and pounced on Belinda, trying to wrestle her to the floor. This was not an easy task, however. Belinda had a lot of pure athleticism ranging throughout her body and bringing her down was more of a chore than they thought.
After managing to get her to the ground, Kathy pulled up Belinda’s shirt and started playing her stomach like a bongo drum. Then she placed her mouth over her belly-button and gave her a nice, loud “splurble.”
At the same time, Gina had Belinda’s arms pinned down with her knees and was practically sitting on her face.
“Here, Belinda, eat my farts,” she teased.
Throughout the entire ruckus, Kathy and Gina had somehow managed to flip Belinda over on her stomach and were now spanking her ass in rhythm, with Gina taking a seat on her back. Unfortunately, unaware of how intoxicated she was, Gina accidentally cracked her onetime too many, the last one landing with the kind of force that really stung.
Belinda was now supremely pissed-off. She pushed herself up with such intense ferocity, it sent Gina flying into a small end table that Kathy had situated next to one of her recliners.
Belinda stood up and screamed, “Goddammit, Gina, that really hurt!!” Her anger was exemplified by swinging her leg at Gina, nearly kicking her in the face. Gina ducked just in the nick-of-time, as Belinda’s foot struck the top of the table— sending a lamp, an ashtray, a small trinket, and the table itself, crashing to the ground.
Gina slowly managed to get to her feet, stunned by the actions that had just occurred. She gave Belinda a light-hearted apology that seemed insincere, due to the fact that she had her hands cupped over her mouth and was giggling the whole time.
Kathy, meanwhile, was absolutely doubled-over with laughter. She was rolling around on the ground, laughing so hard she nearly peed her pants.
It took a while for all the hysteria to die down, as the three of them cleaned up the mess and gradually returned to their rightful seats at the table to catch their breath. Belinda also had to take the time to rub the sting out of her butt cheek.
After they sat down, a fresh round of Miller Lites made their way to the table.
Playtime like that required a cold beverage and a cigarette.