17
Continued from previous page…
CHARLOTTE
Ooh, that’s not a bad idea.
Wait.. How would they know
it’s my shit? A lot of people
would like to do that.
JANE
Uhh, let’s see… Oh ! I know—
you could make a flag
and stick it in there !
CHARLOTTE
A flag?
JANE
Yeah, you could make a flag out of
a pencil and stick it in there.
CHARLOTTE
Oh, man, that’s kinda’ gross.
Do I have to put my
name on the flag?
JANE
No, you could just write “Bon-Apetit” on there.
They’d figure it was you cuz’ you have a French
sounding name.. And you wouldn’t have to
incriminate yourself, ya know, directly. In case
you had to go to court or something.
CHARLOTTE
That is a fantastic plan, Jane.
Is this why we call
you The Genius?
JANE
Yeah, of course ! I think of all the
important stuff. It’s not all
just songwriting and scripts and
stuff with me. Sometimes I think
of the important shit—
Get it? Important shit?
Ba-dah-bum. Problem solved.
CHARLOTTE
Wait, wait, I don’t think
that’s gonna work.
JANE
Why not?
CHARLOTTE
Cuz’ Kronwall might see it
and follow the instructions.
JANE
Ohh, yeah.. I didn’t think of that.
CHARLOTTE
Too bad too cuz’ that was a good idea.
JANE
Well, ya know, there’s your solution
right there.
CHARLOTTE
What?
JANE
Kronwall.
CHARLOTTE
(confused)
What?
JANE
Yeah, just go to him.
Tell him you don’t want
to do it anymore. Tell him you
want out of your contract.
CHARLOTTE
Oh, he wouldn’t help me.
JANE
Why not? C’mon, Charlotte,
that’s what he’s there for.
To take care of everything.
What do you got to lose?
CHARLOTTE
Yeah, but he wouldn’t see that
as taking care of everything.
He’d see that as he’s losing
something he wants around.
That’s the problem.
They love having me around too much.
JANE
Yeah, but Charlotte,
you’re forgetting one thing.
CHARLOTTE
What?
JANE
He’s a man and you’re a sexy woman.
CHARLOTTE
What’s that supposed to mean?
JANE
C’mon, Char, he’s crazy about you.
You know that.
CHARLOTTE
Oh, no he isn’t.
JANE
Charlotte, every man in those offices are
crazy about you. Use that to your advantage.
Kronwall would let you pee in his face just so
he could see where it was comin’ from.
CHARLOTTE
Yeah, well, as much as I’d like to
piss in his face, I’d never
give him the satisfaction of
seeing Chucky.
JANE
(laughing)
Chucky? … You named it Chucky?
Charlotte, you gotta’ be shittin’ me.
Chucky is a guy’s name. What is
wrong with you?
CHARLOTTE
Yeah, but wasn’t there a cartoon beaver
named Chucky?.. One time?
JANE
(laughing harder)
A cartoon beaver named Chucky? I’m
not sure about that one, Char.. I mean,
I’ve heard of Smokey the Bear, but not
Chucky the Beaver.
CHARLOTTE
Are you sure?
JANE
(still laughing)
Pretty sure, yeah.
CHARLOTTE
But, isn’t that how they came up
with that expression?
JANE
What expression?
CHARLOTTE
Ya know… chucking beaver?
JANE
(still in hysterics)
Omigod, Charlotte, you are
so fucking weird sometimes…
Hahahaha !!
Copyright 2020
by Clark Wright