105
Continued from previous page…
CHARLOTTE
Kathy, you’re incorrigible.
KATHY
Sometimes that’s a bad thing.
CHARLOTTE
Well, in this case, it’s not.. I mean,
you’re like a rock… I don’t know
how you do it.
KATHY
(humbled)
I guess I’ve had a lot of practice.
(pauses)
You know.. it goes both ways, Char.
CHARLOTTE
What do you mean?
KATHY
(shyly)
I’ve always looked up to you…
And not just when you’re
standing on a chair.
CHARLOTTE
(flattered)
Really?
KATHY
Yeah, of course… You didn’t know
that? We all do… Everything you’ve
done for us… You’re amazing. All
the way around.
CHARLOTTE
(stammering)
Wow… I didn’t… I mean…
KATHY
(bailing her out)
Charlotte.. look at me…
I know I don’t say this often enough
to you, but…
I think you’re really cool.
Charlotte smiles because she
knows that Kathy meant to say
something really mushy, but
couldn’t quite manage to do so.
CHARLOTTE
(smiling)
Were you gonna say something
else, Kathy?
KATHY
(embarrassed)
No, I meant that… I think
you’re really cool.
Charlotte smiles and decides to
continue with the compliments.
CHARLOTTE
You know what we say about you?
KATHY
That I’m a good dancer?
CHARLOTTE
No, well, that too, of course…
No.. we always say.. we say..
“Kathy would tell a joke
in the middle of an earthquake.”
KATHY
You say that? You guys say
that about me?
CHARLOTTE
Yup.
KATHY
Wow… I like that… Kathy would
tell a joke in the middle of an
earthquake… I like that.. I’ll take
that as a compliment.
CHARLOTTE
Oh, by all means.. It’s meant to be.
KATHY
So.. I’m just like Han Solo in
the trash compactor.
CHARLOTTE
(gets it)
Yeah.. You’re just like Han Solo
in the trash compactor… I like
that… That’s a good one.
KATHY
Now.. if only I can figure out
a way to rescue you.
CHARLOTTE
(matter of fact-like)
Well… Princess Leia didn’t think
he was so good at it.
KATHY
Well, maybe I can do a better job.
Kathy walks over and looks
out one of the windows.
KATHY
(surveying)
Well… we’re definitely surrounded
by water.. Can you swim?
CHARLOTTE
Yes.
KATHY
Forty miles?
CHARLOTTE
No.
KATHY
Neither can I… I got a
better question.
CHARLOTTE
What?
KATHY
Can you fly?
CHARLOTTE
Only first class.
KATHY
Hah.. now that sounds like you…
I don’t know, Char… I think we’re
screwed… Those armed guards
down there don’t exactly look like
they’re using those machine guns
to go hunting for quall… More
like humans.
CHARLOTTE
Terrific.
KATHY
By the way.. we are on the
island of Lesbos, aren’t we?
CHARLOTTE
Yes, we are.
KATHY
Really?… Hmm, interesting… So, if
we’re on the island of Lesbos…
where are all the… lesbos?
CHARLOTTE
This isn’t an island made up
entirely of lesbians, Kath. That’s
just a myth.
KATHY
Hmm.. that’s too bad…
They’re always a lot of fun.
Kathy retreats from
the window.
KATHY
You know.. I’m surprised we
haven’t performed in concert here..
considering our fan base.
CHARLOTTE
(amused)
That’s a good observation, Kath..
I never thought of that… Kinda’
like Pink Floyd playin’ at
The Pyramids.
KATHY
Oooh, Charlotte, that stings…
I don’t want to hear that…
That’s a sad comparison.. They
play at The Pyramids and we play
on the island of Lesbos. Ouch.
CHARLOTTE
Hey, nobody said it was gonna be
easy.. playin’ in a man’s world…
I knew what kind of a crowd we
would attract. We all did. It’s just
the nature of the game… Besides,
I don’t care what people think. I
love our fans. They’re the greatest.
KATHY
I couldn’t agree more.. It’s just one
more door that we’ve opened up.
One more thing that makes us the
pioneers that we are.. I told Jane
the very same thing.
CHARLOTTE
Unfortunately, all this patting
ourselves on the back doesn’t solve
our little problem. How the fuck are
we gonna get out of this mess, Kathy?
I mean, seriously?
KATHY
I don’t know, Char, I really don’t.
You’ve got to make a decision and
you gotta’ do it fast.
CHARLOTTE
Make a decision? Make a
decision on what?
KATHY
On this Mr. Big guy.
CHARLOTTE
On Mikkos? What? You think I’m
actually thinking about
marrying this guy?
KATHY
I think it’s time you consider it.
CHARLOTTE
Oh, no, no, no, no…. I need more
time to think this over… I’m not
gonna just marry this guy and give
in to him… We need more time
to consider an alternative plan.
KATHY
That’s just it, Charlotte…
You don’t have any more time.