44
Continued from previous page…
Gina rips open an
oversized chocolate
bar and takes a bite.
Kathy is disgusted.
KATHY
Simple deduction, Gina.
What else would you
be having for breakfast?
BELINDA
(chiming in)
A glass of chocolate milk.
Gina is about to
perform the classic
routine of having
chocolate stuck to
her two front teeth.
GINA
Hey— what are you
guys trying to say?
That I like chocolate
or something?
Belinda just
shakes her head.
She also has a
tiny smirk on her
face in response
to the audience’s
laughter.
SUSANNA
Well, I’m glad to
see you’re all the same,
mature bunch of ladies
that I’ve come to know.
BELINDA
What do you want, Susanna?
You didn’t come all the way
over here just to gloat
about the charts, did you?
SUSANNA
Oh, no, no, no…
I was also wondering if
you could all guess what
popular magazine I’m on
the cover of this week?
Belinda has heard
just about enough
of this.
BELINDA
Hmm, let me see…
Judging by the looks
of your shirt… I’d have to say—
MECHANIC’S MONTHLY!
Everyone gasps!
SUSANNA
You don’t like my blouse?
BELINDA
No, I don’t like your blouse…
And I don’t like you, either.
You’re a mean, smug, little..
POODLE! Who doesn’t care
about anybody’s feelings but
her own. You’ve got a lot of nerve
coming over here like this…
I’m surprised you have any
friends at all, Susanna.
Wow!! Belinda really
let her have it. But, now
there is a pause in the
action as Susanna looks
like she might start to cry.
Earlier in the day, the
director asked Susanna
if she could cry like
Lucille Ball and Susanna
told him she could do
even better than that.
SUSANNA
But I… I… I didn’t mean
to sound…
WAAAAAAHHHH !!!
AAAHH- HAHH- HAHHHH !!!
Everyone is looking
at each other, not
knowing what to
make of this. I mean—
Susanna sounds
really weird.
GINA
What the hell
is that?!
JANE
Is that the
way Susanna cries?
KATHY
She sounds like
a duck with laryngitis.
BELINDA
Well, somebody better
shut her up or she’s
gonna make Charlotte
come in here! …
And don’t any of you
tattle on me!
Too late.
Charlotte comes
scurrying into
the room from
the left.
CHARLOTTE
What is going on in here?!!
I am having a business
meeting! … Who is that person? …
And why does she sound
like a wounded animal?
GINA
(tattling)
Belinda did it.
A glaring look
from Belinda.
CHARLOTTE
What? What did you do?
BELINDA
Nothing! … That’s Susanna…
Hoffs…
Can’t you tell?
SUSANNA
WAAAHHHH !!!
I’m a good girl !!
I was raised a Catholic!
AHH- HAAAAA !!
Plenty of
confused looks.
JANE
Is she telling us
this.. or crying
because of it?
Hey, the Go-Go’s
come on at a later
time slot. The
dialogue is allowed
to be a little more
salty.
CHARLOTTE
It’s okay, Susanna,
Belinda didn’t
mean it.
BELINDA
(like Elizabeth Montgomery)
Well…
CHARLOTTE
(consoling)
No, she didn’t.
She’ll apologize…
Won’t you, Belinda?
Belinda is still
not sure about
that one.